iTunes Exclusive Episode The Neon Demon

Music
Greetings, Empire member and or members.
If you are hearing the sound of my voice, it means the following conditions have been
met.
At least once in your life, you've listened to the clubhouse podcast.
Live every Sunday, night, 70's during four Pacific.
Your one-stop shop for all things sports in entertainment or pop culture as we like to
call it.
It also means you subscribe on iTunes because it's time for another...
I've tuned this.
It's...
It's...
Be 218th of one of these things.
Welcome.
My name is Rob.
I am the Executive Producer of the Clubhouse podcast.
And I will neither sashay nor shantay.
Nobody wants to see that.
Seriously, that's beyond us.
But I'm not alone for this particular episode.
Jordan and me across the desk is a man who honestly believes the only thing he should ever have to do with a runway as when he's
on a plane.
He is Chad.
Welcome, sir.
Hey man, brother.
Because nobody wants to see anything more than that.
Also joining us for this particular episode is the official fact checker of this show.
And a man whose fashion sense can really only be summed up by a tropical climate.
You may know him as fond Don Go, but his mom and even Don Ford, I'm going to call him Don Ford.
Welcome, sir.
What were those words?
Ash Tia shantay.
What?
Those are modeling terms.
Okay.
How you walk.
Oh, I forgot that when I took a monitor like school back then.
The only thing I know is it's from that RuPaul supermodel song.
Yeah, do you want to say something?
Shantay.
Shantay.
Shantay.
Shantay.
Shantay.
Shantay.
Shantay.
You know what?
No one's going to judge you outward.
I said when you're talking about a tropical climate,
said this guy comes from Sheridan Wyoming.
No, but I'm doing the Jimmy Buffet.
I know, but you know, his fashion sense is more like downparkers.
Whatever we do one of these, it is to review things and this particular episode is no exception.
There's a director whose name is Nicholas winding Reffen.
Did a movie called Drive with the Gosling.
Also worked with the Gosling on only God for Gibbs.
Also worked with Tom Hardy and one of his big breakthrough roles.
I have seen Bronson.
I have seen Bronson.
I've seen Drive.
And every time I look for Drive on cable,
it's always some weird bad cademe hardest in movie from the 80s.
I can't find this one.
His latest film is called the neon demon.
And if you're hearing this right now,
it is available for your edification and theaters.
Before we start this whole thing,
we have to thank our best friends.
We have to thank our best friends.
We have to thank our best friends.
We have to, you know,
we want to thank him for the invite.
We'll leave it at that.
There are some of our favorite people.
We love him.
And they do such an amazing job.
Yes, they do.
So here's what you need to know.
L fanning.
Yes, that L fanning.
Place Jesse.
She's a small town girl who's moved L.A.
wants to be a model.
And she meets up with Ruby, played by Genomellone.
G.G. played by Bella Heathcoat and Sarah played by Abby Lee.
She, her career takes off.
Like a skyrocket.
After she's recruited by Roberta Hoffman,
played by the great Christina Hendrix.
And so the thing is,
in the modeling world,
I'm not going to say there's a lot of jealousy.
Yeah, I'm going to say it.
There's a lot of jealousy.
And that jealousy leads to some very dark times.
You're run time here just under two hours.
How do we begin?
Well, I've been waiting for this.
Visually gorgeous.
Yeah, well shot.
And I think really the best way to sum myself,
because I'm going to bury the lead.
Friend of the show, Jim Bragel,
was my plus one for this particular opus.
Poor guy.
And he said it best.
As he forgiven him.
He said,
Reffen is best
as long as you don't let him write the material himself.
He was the writer on this film.
Just him and him and him alone.
Well,
I mean,
him and then two other people,
but him, he created the story.
Yeah, part of it.
But again, visually beautiful.
He reminded me a lot of X Machina.
Well, you know, visual standpoint.
From a story telling standpoint,
it reminded me more of the night of cops.
Yes.
That thing.
I got to reference this one thing, Chad,
because I need you,
because you couldn't make it.
I wanted you to really engulf yourself
in what we're about to talk about.
Because at one point,
she's on a runway.
And just out of nowhere,
black screen and an inverted neon,
which it only can be described as the,
the trifoil from Zelda on the screen.
Kind of like that,
but you know,
she's okay.
Okay.
She's,
it's flashing between her on the runway,
looking at this thing.
But then I guess in the back of her mind,
there's like the evil side of her,
that's kissing her own reflection in mirrors
on either side.
Very confused.
Hence the title.
I guess what?
But that's,
that would be the only part of it that would reference that.
Right.
In the whole film.
Part of me believes that Zack Snyder got
winded this,
and that's why he cut Jenna Malone out of batman
V Superman.
Wow.
Even though she's going to be back in it
for the extended cut that comes that next month,
which we're going to talk a little bit.
In our normal show Sunday night at 70's from 4 Pacific.
I'm really, really trying to find something nice to say.
Like visually,
it was pretty.
Like that's what I've got.
That's something nice to say.
You know,
he had a Reeves in it.
How they blackmailed him.
He's this.
He's the hotel manager where she lives.
And he's in a very, very uncomfortable sequence
that I'm not even going to talk about.
We're not.
It's like where did that come from on that sequence?
Here you talk about the entire film is an uncomfortable sequence.
Well, yeah.
For about the first few minutes.
Like you're like, okay.
I can see this.
Like it.
And she has a buddy who's a photographer.
And he digs her.
And she's not sure if she digs him.
So there's that going on.
But then all of a sudden,
she goes from like,
innocent, small town girl
to overwitch in like 10 minutes.
Because she has that hollywood.
She has that all natural look.
She does no plastic surgery,
but she looks beautiful.
She's natural.
So people are going to hire her.
And of course,
all of her co-workers quote unquote are not happy.
Dispice her.
It's just, but not happy.
And did,
do you guys tell because I did a little bit of homework on this?
Okay.
Even though I wasn't able to attend this screening.
Yeah.
And in watching the trailer,
and then hearing you guys talk about it,
because you guys called me both of you called me.
That's about immediately after the screening.
And I'm like,
I gave you some readings.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And let's be clear.
You didn't know he was calling me.
You know,
if you know anything about me and going to films,
I sit through the whole thing.
I'm there until the lights come up
and the projector stops running.
Credit one hits the screen.
Don is out the door.
Out the door.
Out the door.
There was a Don size hole in the wall.
It was a vapor trail.
Just in watching this trailer,
I would have gotten nothing.
Oh, and the trailer tells you nothing.
Yeah.
Out of what you guys said.
Except this could get kind of artsy fart seal.
Yeah.
That's the only thing the trailer really tells you.
And, and to hear you tell,
it sounds like,
and I mentioned this to you Rob.
I don't think I've brought it up to Don.
And he may not be familiar with it because I don't know how far
down the horror rabbit hole he goes.
Uh, in the H-O-R-R-O-R.
And in the 70s,
there was a horror film by Dary Argento called Sospiria.
Mm-hmm.
And the trailer, I remember the trailer scared the whole out of me
when I saw it.
And you knew what you were getting.
And it was basically the same kind of thing.
A young,
Anjony joins a ballet school.
Chad with $5 college.
Yeah.
Anjony joins a ballet school.
And she goes through a similar experience.
And so it's like the precursor to Black Swan kind of.
Yeah.
And a lot of people were comparing this to that.
Yeah, well, they probably should compare it to Sospiria.
Uh, but at least when you walked into Sospiria,
you knew what you were walking into.
I-I got it with this, and I-
I don't-
I'm still not sure what I have to do.
No problem with a film being the artsy style and stuff like that.
It makes sense.
And I-I-I'm no problem with that.
This first, this could have been a 30-minute short,
which is the same thing as Sospiria's 35 minutes too long.
Yeah.
But it'd be get the point.
It's like now that it comes to where it could have been a 30-minute short,
where it really got extended.
I had-
I had-
I had a cups was 30 minutes long,
and so it would have been 45 minutes too.
Yeah.
But yeah.
But-
You know, you talked about me walking out.
I-
I almost walked out twice.
I know you did, because-
Yeah.
And if it's one thing you know about Don,
it takes a lot to make Don flinch.
Let's just say it.
Yes.
Like, Donnell watch something like the con-
The congering on you know about him.
Yeah.
But it's me.
Didn't bother him.
He flinched multiple times in this film.
He was sitting right in front of me
to the point where his entire body turned to the left
and his head kept going.
I'm not exaggerating.
Am I-
Am I lying?
No.
That's like there's imagery in this film,
actually in the last 20 minutes.
Well, it's like you get to-
You get to what could be considered the climax of the film.
And then it all just completely goes off the rails.
I mean, to a point where-
I-
Even I was just like-
I guess you get credit because I didn't see this coming.
But why is it here?
It was-
It was for shock value.
You're absolutely right.
You're absolutely right.
You're absolutely right.
And I think to get the public out about this film,
that was his way to do it.
Playing simple, I'm just going to warn it.
Two words.
And it's in my written review at www.cobaspodcast.com.
That is our website.
Cannibalism in Necrophilia.
And not in that ladies of the house kind of way.
Oh, yeah.
Total unneeded.
Like, okay.
You know, it would be alive.
We understand-
Oh, that's-
Can't-
There was a-
It's needed.
It's necessary.
This was-
It's not-
That's why I'm supposed to-
And when-
When the second part of what he says happens,
you really don't know for sure.
Until they actually say it.
And then five minutes later,
there's a scene where you get proof of it.
And the only way I can reference this is you-
Do you remember the story of Nikki Six and Ozzy,
how they used to have their gross out contents?
Yes.
Frame it around that.
And that's all I'm going to say.
Because I-
I mean, there's no need to talk.
They-
No, I don't want to give it the airtime.
What-what seems to most disturbing to me about this is like,
whenever y'all were telling me about this,
I'm like, my gosh, it sounds like this,
guys just trying to be the filmmaker that brought us
the human centipede.
But at least-
And now hear me out here.
At least with the human centipede,
it was a sustained level of
shocking, shocking awe and disgust
that by the time you get to the end,
you would kind of gotten desensitized by it.
Although it was still disturbing.
But with this, it's almost like,
he smacks you upside the head with it with a two-by-four
right at the end just to be shocked.
Yeah.
I-I honestly, you talk about the gross out scene
with Ozzy and the comparison.
When some events happened,
I'd go if this thing happens,
I-
Oh, happened.
And that's why I just like, I go this-
As soon as the first part of that scene happened,
I knew the second part was coming.
And like, once you get there,
you're like, there's no way that this scene closes
any other way.
Because it wasn't needed.
Yeah.
Let's just be disgusting for disgusting scenes.
And that's-
I did everything as I have too much
one respect for allied and the people there.
We love them the death.
And that-
Well, that's why I didn't walk out.
Number two, the integrity of being a reviewer.
You know, that's the only-
If it was at home,
and it's this wasn't something we're reviewing
in this-
I would just like, whatever.
Yeah.
That's which the channel you are.
Because you can't form-
Yeah.
You can't create a form-
And in form-
Depending unless you sit through the whole thing,
it's the god's on his truth.
It's-
It's just long.
It-
It was extended out.
It could have been a 30-minute short
and he added shock for shock value,
but it was not needed.
It was sick and disgusted.
It doesn't sound like it's art for arts.
No, no.
No.
The first half hour was kind of into an interest
to, but then I started to drag,
but then that final,
let's just be-
I could see why he did it,
but it-
It wasn't needed.
He wants it to be water cooler talk,
basically.
Yes.
Exactly.
Get the word out.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Which is sad.
I mean, I liked drive,
but I didn't love it.
I liked it.
Bronson was interesting and entertaining,
but again, it's not something that's going to stick with me.
An acting was a part best.
Hmm.
There's no shoutout role in this thing for me, for an actor.
Do you think something like this damage is L-Fanning's career,
or-
In my eyes,
I thought she was good.
Yeah.
But I think a lot of people are going to be like-
It's like why did Keanu Reeves say-
What's he blackmailed into doing this role?
I don't know.
You know?
I just-
Yeah.
Maybe that-
Make her name?
He's turned his name into a trade-
He's turn his initials into a trade-marker something.
Knickellists winding Reffin, and there was his-
Like he has a logo for his initials.
Yeah.
He has, he has, he has he become another Malik.
Now, the people just want to work of them just because-
I know, he is.
I don't know.
I-
I just don't know.
I just-
I don't understand how-
I mean, yes, I know it's film is is an art medium. It is a medium that
people will pass off as as mindless entertainment and some aspects and
other aspects. It's art for art sake and it's it's best enjoyed in its
purest form. But when it's something like this, it this is the kind of film
that would play in the background of like an Andy Warhol part.
And there's going to be people out there that listen to this review and read
our written reviews at www.theclothhouse.com.
Oh, it's just our website. They're going to go, you just don't get it, man.
You know what, you don't get it either. I didn't get, I mean, I didn't see this
so I really can't give you an informed opinion of it. But happy. Yeah, I'm kind of glad I
kind of dodged a bullet on that. I know that I sat through nine of cups and I thought
I wanted that. But I plan to do it. If you're getting short on the worst trying to find
a top 10 of the year, then watch this because, yeah, I can. I tell you the only reason
I didn't rank this below nine of cups because nobody walked out because nobody walked
out. It's the only reason. I mean, it shocks me. It's one in one A right now. It's one in
one A. I just, I'm amazed. I just, I still haven't decided unless we get three more
horrible beyond these two worst films. This one is going to metal is going to get a metal
turkey. It's either going to be my bronze turkey, silver turkey or golden turkey. I mean,
this, this is going to metal get a metal turkey. This was rushed to get through. I'm
coveted metal ward. It's going to brass or tin aluminum foil. Yeah, this, this is rough
to this. This might get my golden turkey. It's, yeah, you want to know, you want to know
the first time I looked at my watch. Oh, I asked him. That's 10, 15 minutes in ten minutes
in ten. Wow. Wow. That's an ordeal. I sat down and went, this is the next two hours
of my life. And film is not something that you should have to really suffer through.
And unfortunately, when I read the IMDB page, and it said that the last 20 minutes of the film
were pretty much improvised, you're kidding me. And that's when all of this. And
well, it happens according to IMDB, the scene that Don was referring to in the first of
his two subjects. That was improvised, too. Wow. It's okay. Yes, it could say it's fantasy is
all we're saying. Yes, that was completely improvised. Somebody needs another hobby. I mean,
I'm not talking about us. I mean, I mean, we have to do the final. Yes, the
representatives, we we we have to say consistent. So I think we're going to have a second question.
Well, I mean, explain how this works to people that are new to the show. They deserve it.
The way we do the final analysis on the show. We're not going to give you thumbs up thumbs down. We're
not going to give you numbers, letters, stars, whatever. Our audience whom we affectionately refer to as
the empire. And we like to do them a favor by seeing these movies and telling them about them. Good
battering different. They want us to go deeper. So we're going to do that. Two questions are involved in
this question. Number one, would you see this film again? The answer is no, then we're done here.
And I think you probably figured what we're going to say by now. But if the answer is yes, the scale
that we use is would you see it in first run in the evening show? Would you do twilight? Would you just
below that? And then right below that would be Matt and A right below that would be early morning
on a weekend. Right below that would be dollar theater second run. Right below that would be
red box, which means you'd have to actually have to leave your house. Right below that would be
streaming on that folks. Right below that would be cable. I'd like to speak for Don, because
I don't like to speak for people very often, but I would bet my mortgage that Don and I have the same
exact opinion is one below streaming on Netflix is the one where you're kicking the disc down the
street. You basically say I would wait for the events in this is the end to actually happen before
I would watch this filming again. Okay, yeah, I first off, yeah, that's a big no on this and this
will make my top 10 worst of the year. It might get a metal turkey bronze, you know bronze gold or silver
and I give this the dentist review. Which means get a rookie now without Nova came before watching this
because that will be more terrible. Get a rookie rookie now while this is playing on a screen in front of
you before you would see this because that's that's worth another game. Oh, that's got a great idea.
The only reason you would see recommend this the second viewing is if the projector was turned off.
Oh Christmas presents. Okay, if you spend actual money on this even as a gag gift,
I will grab a random chair in this studio and hit you with it and then I will pick it up and hit you again.
Because as much as I hate the smell of burning plastic, that in my fireplace might suit me.
A little bit. You could you could use another throwing star.
It is the neon demon before we end this melee directed and ridden by Nicholas one stop. We love allied. We don't
play them. We don't play them. We don't play them. No, but thanks for the invite and we really love
about we love our vendors. If they ask for our on 3v, we have thanks for the invite regardless in
all that stuff. We still love you. We don't play me. You didn't make this thing just do the plugs and
get out of here. Visit our website, the aforementioned www.theclubhousepodcast.com.
Just find out everything you need to know and some stuff you don't.
Both our Facebook page and our Instagram feed are the same handle. They are both the clubhouse podcast,
but the whole thing up there. Our Twitter handle because we can't fit that many letters is clubhouse show.
You can follow me on Twitter if you like. I am a yes that Rob Irvin that is built ERV. I am
that chat and PG-699 on Twitter. I'm at Funtago and you can email me at Don at theclubhousepodcast.com.
Email Don for information on how we can come to a live show. We love doing live remote shows
and hanging out with the empire. Email me if you'd like questions, comments, concerns,
somebody go pound sand. I am Rob at theclubhousepodcast.com. I am chat at theclubhousepodcast.com.
Charlotte Parker is on Pinterest because we're morally obligated to say that. And I'm just going
again. I don't normally speak for people, but I am going to speak for your wife who is a
racist and she would not enjoy the zoo. Yeah, I'm happy she missed it. Our normal show live every
Sunday night 70 should be for Pacific is your one-stop shop for all things pop culture. So until
next time for Don, for Chad, for the empire, I'm Rob. Clubhouse is closed and I don't even think
if Brittany Palmer was in the theater like with concessions for me, I still don't think it would
have proved this thing.