iTunes Exclusive Episode Hotel Transylvania 3 Summer Vacation

Greetings Empire member and or members.
If you are hearing the sound of my voice, the following conditions have been met.
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But it also means you subscribe to this show on your favorite podcast app.
And by the way kids, not only is this the last iTunes exclusive of season 8, this is
also number 400.
400 of these things we've done, whether it's film, whether it's television, whether
it's stage production, we've had your back this entire time because that's how we roll.
Welcome, my name is Rob, I'm the executive producer of the Clubhouse podcast and I do not
say blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, except that I just did.
Joining me across the desk as he tends to do is my co-host and a man who doesn't nearly
have as many kids as Steve Ushami's character in the movie we're about to talk about.
He is Chad.
Welcome sir.
Thank God for that.
Next to him is the lady of the house and she'll stay in a hotel but not in Transylvania.
She is Jen Roam.
Welcome friend.
Good evening and I think I'm the one who stayed in like 3 or 4 different haunted hotels
on purpose.
I'm out.
Rounding out the day is the newest member of the cast and a man who likes his Franken
Berry.
Don't ever try to take it away from him.
He is Alex.
Welcome sir.
Anybody reaching for my foods pulling back a stone?
That's right.
Right there with your brother.
Whatever we do one of these, it is to review something this is no exception.
The third film in the series.
It is Hotel Transylvania 3.
We want to thank everybody at Levinson for giving us the opportunity to come see this
film.
We're very excited to do so.
We love our vendors.
They take care of us so well.
Letting us see movies in advance so that we can talk to you guys about them and you
can make the best possible decision for your entertainment dollar.
The whole crew is back well minus one.
Michelle Brooks, Adam Sandler, Selena Gomez, Andy Sandberg.
You'll have you also have Catherine Han joins us, Fran Drescher, Steve Ushami, David
Spade, Tara Strong, how are you doing?
She's a very small role in this, but she's still in it.
Keegan Michael, Keegan James, Chris Parnell, Chrissy Teegan, Molly Shannon, do I need
to keep going?
It's impressive.
I mean there's more.
I was just waiting to see where you were going to stop.
Jim Gaffigan, Joe Jonas.
All in one film.
Do I see?
I did.
Oh, Aaron LaPlant.
Okay.
This is all voice talent.
This go round.
You've got Dracula played by Adam Sandler.
Would you like a piece of pie?
So things are kind of just going for him.
So his daughter, Davis, again, played by the Selena Gomez.
She convinces him to take a vacation so they go on a cruise because where do monsters
go on a cruise, but to the Bermuda Triangle?
They're not alone.
All this time, you also have a subplot about the Van Helsing family and their intertwining
with Dracula as well.
That about how it's far you want to go.
This film runs about an hour and a half, which is average fare for kids film.
They make no mistake.
This is a kids film.
Tons of kids in the audience.
I don't know how I feel about this.
If you said to me, Rob, some this film up in one word, I would say silly, because that's
what it's supposed to be.
It's supposed to be silly fun.
However, I really hope this is the last one.
Do you hope it's the last one so you don't have to watch anymore?
Or do you hope it's the last one because I've run out of bits?
This one just doesn't.
It didn't do for me with the other.
You know, I mean, you've got the whole cast of characters, you know, doing their thing.
You hit your head?
No, that was just, I thought I was only willing to hurt that.
The story here is kind of thin.
Yeah, it really is.
It's almost transparent.
I guess the thing that this was really missing that the other two seemed to have so much
of his charm.
Except for one character.
The character of Johnny just always makes me happy.
He's getting kind of one note though.
Yeah, but it was still great because, remember, the DJ booth is a sacred place.
I got dragged kicking and screaming into this franchise because I was avoiding it like
the plague until my daughter convinced me to jump on board with it because once you watch
it, you'll understand and I found myself tearing up at the end of Hotel Transylvania because
Drack and Mavis' relationship reminded me so much of mine and my kid.
Yes, it does.
And she's like, I told you, I told you that's what would get you.
And then in the second one, you see their relationship develop even further.
This one, like another thing I noticed about the first two was that every monster, every
featured monster kind of had their moment, a highlight moment.
Yeah.
They didn't hear.
They really didn't hear.
Not a good chunk of them.
They were very briefed.
But was it new months?
No, no.
Was it new monsters or was it the same because then it would be, is there a need to give
them a moment if they've had their moment in the first two?
Well, I mean, again, you've kind of established something and I'm not saying so much as like,
I'm not sure if I'm explaining this correctly, but like they all had a moment that you really
remembered that was, that was very funny.
It just kind of left itself imprinted on yourself on yourself, gotcha.
I think I have a better one with that.
Each character that was named, you'd recognize who the talent was if you were paying attention,
but they all had their scene that would stand out.
So it highlighted every person.
But I don't know that that was called for in this one because this one was more drag story
than anything else.
Oh, but I mean, so were the other two.
It was all about how he was dealing with his, you know, 500 year midlife crisis, but I
do not say blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
I'm not going to ruin that.
Now, what, so they go more in depth just as I, because I wasn't allowed, I didn't get
to go see it.
I know I'm going to have to take my little buddy Brody Bailey is dragging me kicking and screaming,
I got to go take him to see this.
But they did the Dracula story in the first one to an extent.
So this is just going deeper into his story?
Not really.
No.
Okay.
And yes, I know this is a kids film.
But about at the 20 minute mark, I almost looked at you and went, I think we all see where
this is going.
Well, they gave it away in a trailer pretty much.
I didn't watch the trailer.
Well, the trailer completely blew this film and I felt like in sacrifice of story, we
got a lot of this.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You know, oh, garlic doesn't kill me.
But I'm garlic in taller.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So we have to deal with, I know where you're going with this.
I'm trying to find it and I can't find it right off the bat.
Ha.
No, no, no, no.
No, no, no, but he said right off the bat.
Oh, God.
I totally do.
Again, did not intend to do that.
So on our pun scoreboard, Jen is now ahead at one, to nothing, to nothing, to nothing.
Yeah, I remember, I remember whenever that joke happened, just leading over to Julesle
and Mike really, really Sandler, this is, this, this always seems to be your fault.
I don't know that you can blame him for that.
Yeah.
You kind of can.
No, no, no, no.
It's the Eddie Murphy principle.
It's when he was saying he wasn't going to do another Beverly Hills cop and then said,
you wait, you're paying me how much?
Yeah, I'll do whatever you want.
Yeah.
And it was voice works.
Yeah, it was, I am garlic and tolerant.
Yeah.
Pretty much that's what you got.
Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.
I'm like, come on.
You know, you've, you've done two movies where you really didn't always rely on that.
All your other stuff does.
The animated stuff hasn't been in now and they keep writing the check.
I mean, are you going to tell them, no, don't pay me millions of dollars to do the same
bit?
And the odd thing is it's like, this is not a bad film.
It's just not a good one.
It's just not in, it wasn't enjoyable for me.
No, I like the one part that had me cracking up was the part that had you moaning and
looking for the door.
No, no, is the non enjoyment because they've done three of these and they're beating a dead
horse?
Or is it because it wasn't necessarily for your age, demographic, and a much younger crowd
might still enjoy this one?
It's just a bad script.
No, I'm still trying to put what parts you're talking about.
The battle at the end, right, just the choice that got made had me cracking on my, oh my
god, of all the things you could have chosen, I, and it's not that I'm just such a huge
fan of that.
I just thought it was like, wow, it just had heavy rolling, I'm like, because I knew it
was making you.
I feel like he's just trying to play sound effects over top of you continue.
No, no, no, he knows exactly what I do.
Yeah, yeah, but again, as a former DJ, you have to understand my pain in that scene.
And the wife feels the same, which is like, oh, I'll just literally tear under her breath
to go, oh, bloody hell, no, I mean, and again, if it wasn't for Johnny in that scene, it
wouldn't have been a lot more painful because I've always liked that character just because
like he's just a buffoon and it's just, it's so funny how he interacts with Mavis.
It just, I just like that relationship, the oblivious nature, yeah, because you know,
the DJ booth is a sacred space, that, I just said, I don't think the villain was all
that credible.
You take, you take the villain who is, but again, you saw, I mean, there's, everything
was so transparent.
I was like, did a baby write this?
That's, yeah, that's kind of, so I'm saying it's just a bad script.
It's just very poorly stitched together.
See, you keep going with that, but the other part about it is, do you think that they
care what you think of it, or do they only care for that, you know, five years old to
care?
But they seem to care in the first two.
Yeah.
I don't know if they even really cared as much as they had more to work with.
The first two were very entertaining.
I think they were very real written, especially from a standard of what Sanders could, you
know, accustomed to working with, because he normally was like, yeah, you'll pay me how
much.
Okay, I'll do anything.
Those first two films did not feel like sandwich films.
I remember when we reviewed two, I'm like, if Sandler needs to do anything else for
the rest of his life, he just needs to do this because it works.
And now all of a sudden, so this is your fault.
No.
I'm just saying, it's not like he hasn't done anything else.
He's done other things before this after the second Transylvania.
And it's just, I don't know, I don't know who to blame here.
I really don't know who to blame here because something just felt off about it.
It just didn't pass the smell test.
Yeah.
And again, it's like, I didn't hate this film.
I just didn't love this film.
And I love the first two.
And this one, I was like, what is this going to be over with?
Anything else we want to cover?
We'll get to the final analysis.
Anyone, Bueller?
Crickets.
All right, the way we do the final analysis on this show, we're not going to give you thumbs
up, thumbs down.
We're not going to give you letter grades, numbers, anything like that.
Up to two questions.
Question number one is, would we see this film again if the answers know that we're done
here?
But if the answer is yes, then we go to how much we'd be willing to pay to see it.
From the best of the best of the worst of the best, here's the spectrum.
No price at the theater, down to a twilight showing, down to a matinee showing, down to
early morning on a weekend, down to second run at the dollar theater, down to actually
leaving the house and getting it from red box, down to streaming it on Netflix, down to
watching it on cable chat.
Would you see this again?
I doubt it.
Chant says no.
I'm going to disagree.
I say I will see this again.
However, I'm going to go the Netflix round on this.
I wouldn't walk across the street.
I'm going to go the Netflix round.
Adam, I'll access the hint of.
Close.
But I do have a question that'll give a little bit of a wrinkle to this.
Okay.
And Chad has already said no.
For you, you said Netflix.
As somebody who will be taking a small human, how far should I go to see it?
Catch an early morning sun Saturday.
Because if a small human insists on seeing us in a theater, pay as little as you can without
cheapening it.
Because if you go to the dollar theater, you're running a risk of being at the dollar
theater.
There's also.
You know what I mean?
But go...
And you're delaying going and hanging out with your little buddy.
Yeah.
That is true.
Go early in the morning and then go to Chick-fil-A or something afterwards and have lunch.
No, no.
Too much sugar for Brody Bailey at the Chick-fil-A.
We'll have to find something where I throw him in a ball pit and then call his mother.
Oh.
Okay.
Draft house that are something.
By the way, directed and co-written by how I'm going to screw this up.
Tartikovsky.
Tartikovsky.
Tartikovsky.
Tartikovsky.
Tartikovsky.
Tartikovsky.
Hotel Transylvania III.
Summer vacation.
And again, thanks to everybody at Levinson for letting us come out and see this.
Don's on vacation.
So he wasn't with us.
But I know that he takes care of the business for us.
So we want to make sure we think all of our vendors who let us see movies early so we can
tell you guys how to best spend your entertainment dollar.
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Palmer, I mean, Cherish don't care to give her that role, I'm just saying it.